Family wall

I stood up once,
In a shade of memory,
And counted the many lines
Between my hands
And the woven tapestries,
family photos
Hanged on walls of my life.
Where pain can enter,
Through the empty space of threads,
And sky remains the same.

I opened an old closet
Found the family album,
That used to be part of my belonging.
There is no clock on a wall,
or a calendar
to tell me,
how many seasons are passed
since I have left home
to ride the drunken clouds.
How many apple trees
abundant with ripen fruits,
while I was moving forward
Like tides,
towards eternal love.

Departure after departure
lesser people each time,
more silence.
Farewell seems
a city made of
the forgotten tradition.

Moon and sun,
hold their promise,
stayed witness
to what passed
through my empty vessel
in time.

Once, I had a family,
A house full of seasons,
And a playroom with dolls,
toys and
A mirror on a wall.
That was the first place,
I discovered,
How playing works… who is the director,
and I am more than my acts.
I learnt blood is red,
and hurt always made someone cry.
Anyone could
throw a stone,
and shout,
I want to love you!
And all is part of a play.

I understood,
pain could steal all of my dreams,
my faith to meet true face of love,
If I don’t stand up
For myself,
and end the play,
I am lost in my many acts,
So I did.

I left home,
city to city,
country to country,
Departure after departure,
I became a seer.

The line connected me to past
Was bold and thick,
Full of thorns
took many visits of pain,
Anger and depression
Before I realize,
The family album
Is not my inheritance.

Once, I had a family
But they never wanted to know my thirst,
My passion to meet God,
In each tide,
in each stone.
I can’t make out their faces anymore,
Or know what they truly feel,
They are ghosts in an imaginary world,
Unless they wake up,
They will never know,
The happiness I live in…

Free of all traditions, frames,
Surrender to tides
that moving me forward
With a heart simply open
To hold eternal
love God

© Serena Devi, July 2011

2 responses to “Family wall”

  1. Dear ram,…. you kind and generous with your heart..with your words…in deep gratitude
    I would like to share this

    I am so drunk
    I have lost the way in
    and the way out.
    I have lost the earth, the moon, and the sky.
    Don’t put another cup of wine in my hand,
    pour it in my mouth,
    for I have lost the way to my mouth.

    love all

  2. dear and divine Serena ….. Raft along the river of life……witness how different civilizations refer water with totally different names…..but essence of all different names is to quench thirst only…….so is with God……to quench thirst for eternal happiness with every breath is experience …..and you are experience and awareness now…….love all..

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