Surrendering to core of here and now

Beloved friends,

These days I ask myself, do I have to speak or milk the energy deeper into my being? Is my silence serve better or my words.

 Today, I and whatever appears in physical dimension of ( I Am)is bare, naked out and in,  without a cover or even a way out of the moments that I have to journey to depth of my heart and witness my human helplessness, I feel no fear and yet this deep squeeze on all ideas I had about myself and sinking in this dark void of not knowing what to do or how to be…..hearing and sensing Divine self in a way that It is indescribable and still feels, I am in agony of rebirth, trying so hard not to try, not jump into action or plan, as it is clear after the last 6 months of being homeless, giving up all privileges and comfort which I was so attached to, to say “yes”to my heart, the love and passion to Truth, to this intimate love affair with The beloved that since early age had consumed and burnt my human story to unveil who I really am and every stage of my many roles which I have been taken on from a daughter to a mystic, from a well off life to be poor ( as some fb friends recently put me under the category), from a creative individual to be a silent feminine womb in service of Devi…
 I have come to far deeper surrendering that I could ever imagined or allowed into myself. It is so dark and so light at the same time to just be here and breathe and long deeper to be called into cycle of newness… my heart cries to have a home, and build new homes for all five tribes that travelled from beyond to be here and serve Gaia.
   Two weeks ago I arrived to the unfamiliar moment that I had to ask Friends/ Sky/Universe, rain…

rain on my thirsty crops, rain on open cracks of my fragile life as I have came to final crossroads of dark and light. I have come to end of my human and this lifetime aching of my soul to stand in truth of one.

And I still standing in this moment, sinking to its power and my own mind helplessness to change what she sees as a situation!
While my higher self fully merging with sun and Sirius and my body is bombard and electrified by  rays of energy, and day in and day out, I am alone with no interaction or distraction, pure aloneness with present and all I want, is jump into plane, go to San Francisco, starting talking, speaking of I knew since 2008… Say loud, cry loud… I am Kali, I am the future of Earth…I am one of the 13 initiators to take Gaia to Her rightful frequency and either humanity (3D) comes or they face the destruction which is on its way. I want to say to lightworkers, I am assigned to invite and recruit volunteers whom are ready to let go of their so far established work, their brands. This Unity and new Earth that  we speak of is not going to merge unless you let go of all old ways, including being a light worker, way shower, grid worker, earth keeper,…

Yes, it is my purpose and I am burning to do it and yet my being has not cooked enough, ready  enough, died enough to speak in such a confirmation, but I will.

I press thorns deeper into my heart and even I am love and divine joy, my life story is story of a burning hero and my heart choosing as pure and truthful has always been, still hold me in burning lava and fire, for purification and crystalline voice.

Today, I found the courage to say these words, as I have been listening to my sisters and brothers on fb platform and other places, as how deeply we burnt ourselves, no skin and dawn on knees not even knowing where this moment brings. Truth is magical and also could be very deadly if we refuse to meet all human aspects and release them through power of love than fear and limitation. 
At five years old, I could hear the stars, all of my life I had and have direct communication with the source and the messages was always the same… today, between waves of energy landing from my star home, Sirius and my human tears and the vulnerability of my body and acceptance of present, I bow to my Creator, and ask her to guide me and all of us to be fully committed to Divine plan and will and surrender even deeper. As whatever we are which never will be more perfect, than divine expression, could only be expressed, manifest and shared through her breathe of love. 
Thank you for listening, feeling, sharing and walking your own path in devotion to one.